Shadow in light
by Snorkling
Summary: Raven has issues. With herself. With Robin. With Starfire. And it hurts so bad. [Title may change.]
1. Dreams

**A/N:** Just an idea. If you like - review to tell me - I'll write more.

Again, if you see any mistakes, feel free to tell me.

* * *

Gleaming, red hair. Long and smooth. A vibrant colour, which drew everybody's attention. 

Big, green eyes. Beaming with joy, naivety, an openness to the world that always shone.

Perfect skin. Perfect body.

She was sweet, she was caring, she was openhearted and generous. An excellent fighter, who could always bring the bad guys to justice. Never cheating or hurting anybody on purpose. Always polite. Always so… so… perfect.

So not Raven.

Raven…

Short, midnight-black hair. Big, dark purple eyes with constant black markings around them, like she had an unhealthy relationship to an eyeliner. Scrawny body, with skin so pale it looked grey.

And her personality… sarcastic, gloomy. Always pointed out the worst things about everything, a scenario, a friend, a piece of work. She rarely smiled. She was dressed in a long cloak and a hood, which usually covered her face.

And then there was that whole "father-being-incarnation-of-evil"-thing…

Raven could not feel. Her powers were barely contained as it was. Emotions let them run loose. And they were evil. Pure evil. The worst part being, that they were a part of her soul, making her equally evil.

She was not allowed to feel… but she felt nonetheless.

* * *

_They were in a church. A sanctuary. Sitting on the floor next to each other._

"_Just because you don't have a party doesn't mean it's not your birthday," Raven said sadly. Her body was filled with red, glowing marks, that meant the end of the world, but somehow it suddenly didn't matter. She looked Robin straight into his uncovered eyes._

_He leaned forward and cupped her cheek. She felt strangely light._

"_Th-the mark on my forehead… it means…"_

"_Later," he merely whispered, before leaning over and pressing a soft kiss on her lips –

* * *

_

She was ripped brutally from her dream by a loud alarm, and the room flashed an angry red under the light of a bulb placed in the loft. Raven sat upright and gasped.

Somewhere far away, she heard a bump and a loud, though muffled yelp, sounding like it was coming from Beast Boy. Raven heard somebody run through the corridor, and Robin yelled, "TITANS! Get up!"

As if moving in slow-motion, Raven brought her hand to her lips. She could still feel the tinkling sensation where she had dreamt he had –

A loud banging on the door made her whole body jerk. "Raven! Quick!" Robin exclaimed on the other side, before moving on down the corridor.

She grabbed her cloak and fastened it to her shoulders, making sure the hood covered her blushing cheeks perfectly. "Coming," she whispered, before phasing through the wall.

* * *

**A/N:** I really want to know what you think about this, so review? Pretty please?


	2. Nightly quarrels

**A/N**: Second chapter. The chapters in this story is gonna be pretty short! Be warned...

As always, any correction of the grammar would be very much appreciated.

No. No, I don't own them.

* * *

"So who're we dealing with this time?" 

"Yeah. Who's sick enough to trigger our alarm _when we're asleep_?!"

The five tired titans were all sitting in the T-car, and Cyborg was, as always, driving. Raven and Starfire had chosen to drive with the others, since they would have trouble flying in the dark. Robin was at the front seat, next to Cyborg. Starfire sat in the middle behind them, Beast Boy to her left: this left Raven to stare at the back of Robin's seat. This was a great disturbance for her, as she could see every move he made… and she desperately needed to get him out of her head before battle.

It was 2 o'clock in the morning and heroes or not, neither of the Titans felt up to the beat.

"There was no identification," Robin replied sternly, ignoring the last comment from Beast Boy. "Somebody's broken into a store downtown, but whoever it is, he's new."

Cyborg made a sharp turn down a new road, heading straight towards the core of the city.

"Wait, wait," Beast Boy protested. Raven rolled her eyes, expecting the usual, lame joke, but was surprised: "Why are we being send out to take care of a simple burglar? I mean…" He looked appealingly at the others, mainly the girls – "I know the city police relies on us a lot, but a burglar?! Come on!"

Raven moved her sight from him and slumped back in her seat, once again resuming her stare at the back of the fearless leaders head right before her. She had a sudden urge to reach out and touch it, and she immediately, but silently, scolded herself.

_Stop it! This isn't the time! Come on. Deep breaths. In… out. In… _

Azarath. Metrion. Zinthos.

Azarath. Metrion. Zinthos.

Azarath…

"Come on, guys, its weird! Admit it!"

Raven frowned and closed her fists. How was she supposed to relax when Beast Boy was whining like that?!  
"Beast Boy, the owner himself requested our help." Robin's voice sounded like he was clenching his teeth together. "If he meant the city police could have handled it…"

"I'm just saying…"

"Beast Boy! We're not turning around!"  
"But it is in the middle of the night!"

"_Cut it out!_" Raven roared all of the sudden, and she only just kept her eyes from flashing black. Beast Boy gave her a weird look, like he was about to retort something, but then simply shook his head and turned to stare out of the window.

"Cool down, y'all," Cyborg growled from the front seat.

"Yes, please," Starfire added, looking worriedly from Raven to Beast Boy. "We are all tired, but we should not yell at each other."

They raced through the empty night for a few, silent minutes, before Cyborg announced, "We're here."

"Alright, team." Robin laid an arm over his seat and turned to look at the three in the back as well as Cyborg: "We don't know what we're dealing with, and none of us are really on top. I suggest we block the exits, so our John Doe can't get away, rather than just barge in as usual. Raven…"

Her heart skipped a beat.

"… do you know this place?"

She leaned forward, a little baffled, and stared out of the front window, while Beast Boy began, "Why would she…"

"The Library of Shadows!" Raven gasped, her eyes widening. "Yes, I know it… but I never thought…" She paused. Considered quickly.

"Look, not to be a pain in the behind, but if we wait any longer, our guy will be long gone," Cyborg noted. Robin just looked at Raven, who briefly closed her eyes and tried to remember, what they were talking about. All she could seem to focus on was which colour those eyes might be behind that mask…

_Focus!_

"There's the entrance, a backdoor and some large windows in the roof," she recalled, talking so rapidly it made the other titans exchange surprised looks. "That's it, I think…"  
"Alright. Raven, we'll cover the backdoor, Cyborg and Beast Boy, take the main doors, and Starfire, you'll fly to the roof…" Robin paused briefly to hear any possible protests. When no came, he quickly continued, "Titans, go!"

They left the T-car in a run.

And Raven just couldn't get Happy to stop squealing, "He chose you! He chose you!"


	3. Library of Shadows

**A/N**: Let me know if I should continue. I'm not quite sure :)

You are more than welcome to point out any grammar mistakes. As always.

Teen Titans belong to themselves! Oh, yeah, and to DC comics.

* * *

Raven had been to the Library of Shadows only a few times before, though she liked the place. It was a small, gloomy shop, situated between a record store and a café: it almost disappeared between the large, colourful facades on both sides of it, especially since it was drawn back, so that one would have to walk down a small alley to reach the entrance. The building was low, with a roof that seemed to glide down over the front. It was build with some kind of dark stone, which looked completely black in the night, even though the moon shone full and bright over them.

Raven and Robin glided silently trough the shadows; making their way over the café, as it was the shortest way to the back of the Library. She flew, and he used his grappling hook to get to the flat roof, running to the edge and jumping into nothing. Raven created a black oval for him to land on, and situated him on the ground, landing besides him. She pointed towards the backdoor, and he nodded. They proceeded.

_See?_ she said to herself. _This works much better without the feelings! So just… shake them off. You know it's not you he wants anyway…_

God that thought hurt. She involuntarily stopped, breathing deeply. Robin turned to eye her quizzically.

"Are you alright?"

"Sure," she quickly grumbled, extremely happy with the hood covering her face. "It's nothing."

He didn't buy it.

"Are you… sure? You seemed a bit anxious earlier, when you saw the shop."

"Yeah, well," she mumbled and stepped past him, trying hard to ignore when she brushed lightly against him. "I've never seen anything special in there, but I always had a feeling…" She shrugged it off. "Let's just get in there."

Robin opened his mouth, but changed his mind, seemingly accepting the fact that she did not wish to talk about it – after all, she was Raven – and grasped his communicator.

"Calling Titans. Raven and I are at the backdoor. Confirm status."

"Jeez, it's two fifteen in the middle of the night," Beast Boys aggravated voice came from the other line. "Can't you just cut the military-lingo?"

"We're here," they heard Cyborg sigh.

"I, too, am at the correct location," came the melodic tone belonging to Starfire. "I cannot see through the glass, though: it is somehow darkened."

Robin and Raven exchanged looks; she shrugged.

"Alright, we'll look into that in a second. Titans, move in!"

"Ay-ay, commander!" mocked Beast Boy, and shortly after, they heard the characteristic sound of a sonic blaster doing what it was best at.

Here we go, Raven thought, and focused her energy and soul-self: the backdoor glowed black and was flung from the wall. Robin ran through, and she followed.

* * *

Darkness.

It was the first Raven noticed – of course. She felt like somebody had pulled a dark cloth over her eyes or something like that. In front of her, she could hear Robin cautiously take a few steps.

"Raven?"

"Right here."

"Can you do something about it?"

"I don't think so…" She paused. An uneasy feeling was creeping up her spine.

She heard the low "beep" which meant Robin had again flashed his communicator: "Star?" she heard him say in a low voice. "Where are you?"

"Still outside, Robin," the alien replied. "Are you in need of assistance?"

"Of light, mostly. We can't see a thing down here."

"Just a minute."  
A few seconds later, a loud crash broke the creepy silence, and green light illuminated the inside of the Library of Shadows: it was filled with dark artefacts and strange objects, standing on small, fragile tables around the room and on pedestals. Enormous bookcases were integrated in the wall and filled with hundreds and hundreds of books. The floor was covered in glass-splinters. Beast Boy and Cyborg entered the light from the other side of where Robin and Raven where standing, their eyes big as they watched the surroundings.

Raven didn't notice this at all. She was staring at the centre of the floor, right beneath where Starfire was hovering, where a slumping figure was standing next to a candle, which instead of glowing, emitted pure darkness. Therefore, the crouching figure could not be seen in details. But Raven knew who it was nonetheless. The aura was faint, barely even there, but she would have recognised it any day.

"Impossible…" she whispered in utter shock. The figure rose from the floor and tilted its head a little, apparently looking her way.

"I thought you might show up, Raven," he noted in a distant whisper.

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**A/N**: Dun-dun-dun. If you review, I will give you a cookie - a virtual one, but shiny nonetheless! 


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